This week has been quite the emotional roller coaster for me. On Thanksgiving I received the news that my uncle Marc, who is like a brother to me, passed away that morning. my world stopped and i felt every emotion over come me. this was my worst fear. i did know that his health was decreasing quickly but i didn't realize it would take him this soon. this trial has not been easy to face but i haven't had to face it alone. My Savior has been with me every step of the way!
On Monday my parents and i had to have that tough conversation over email. they told me he wasn't doing well and it was probably coming to an end soon. they asked what i wanted to do. i couldn't imagine going home especially this far out. there wasn't much i could do there anyway. I then had the thought to see if i could face time home to say my goodbyes to him. my mission president granted my request. so on Tuesday night, which happened to be his birthday, i was able to talk with him. that was the hardest call i have ever had to make. he told me that i was in big trouble and that i wasn't suppose to call him haha i assured him i got permission. he then said how we can do this for 5 more weeks. that broke my heart cause i knew he wasn't going to make it that long nor did i want him to suffer anymore. he never stopped amazing me on how positive he was through this battle. i love him and miss him very much.
I know the Lord's hand was involved in this because i witnessed many tender mercies. of course this wasn't the outcome i was hoping for but i feel closer to Marc then ever before. the morning he passed away i happened to be studying about the spirit world. as i was reading a talk, comfort and peace came over me. i knew that he was going to be okay and happy and i knew that i would see him again someday. he has important work to do on the other side. i know he came and visited me that morning!
i have such a strong testimony of this church. i know this church is true. i know God loves us all individually and has a plan for each one of us. i know that families are forever and that i will be reunited with Marc again. its neat thinking that i get to serve with Marc, his mission is just on the other side. I also know that the Atonement is real. it has given me the strength and power that i need to get through this loss without my earthly family here with me. but i know i have my Father in Heaven and Christ to turn to for that comfort. my relationship with them has become stronger because i have relied on them to get me through this. the Atonement will carry us if we allow it to do so. i love my family very much and are praying for you all to feel the same peace that i have felt these past few days. losing a loved one isn't easy but with the knowledge we have we know this isn't the end! He is our guardian angel!! :)
I now have even another reason to finish my mission strong! :) I love you Marc!
until we meet again! :)
Love Sister Johnson :)
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